chaverah

Hey there out there. Haven't been in blog world in ages. Life got very hectic and didn't have the time and energy to keep writing. A lot has happened in the past year and it's amazing what time can do for a person.

Time, what is it?
-Is it the hours in a day that lets you manage your life.
-Is it numbers in a circle that goes round and round.
-Maybe time is just a four letter word that we try to define.

Well I finally realized that for me time heals. I could have never guessed it but time does heal a person. Everything else a person tries to do to feel better in hard situations is not as good as the best medicine time.

wait and you will see.

Don't get me wrong. Events that happens in ones life that are very difficult to deal with you will never forget. The pain you feel will never completely go away. However your mind starts to numb the body from such ill thoughts and start to create new ideas to deal will old issues. Its pretty amazing how god created human beings.

AS you get older you realize time goes faster and faster.I realized that I need to live with the moment and take a deep breath and enjoy it. Catch it while I can!

I will end with a little poem.

Time is your friend
I could not live without.
Time is my medicine
It made me smile from a pout.

Of what I see
and what I hear
I am far better now
then the previous year.

I learned that time
has talked to me
it took many hours
to just be.

I hope and pray
god continues to give me the strength and hope
carry me along
and learn to always cope.

thank you for YOUR time. May we all be blessed for as much time as we need.

So the question of the day is which one are you?

Which one would you like to be? Is there a preference you would rather be? I am not just talking about the bedroom. I am talking about the way you live day to day. The way you are with people. The way you treat your spouse. OK OK and also what goes on in the bedroom. When I look at people around me I have realized that people are not who they seem. SO I ask you:
Do you look like a pussy cat on the outside and a tiger behind close doors?

Let us all see a little bit of what goes on behind your close door, don't be shy!

I'm holding on your rope,
Got me ten feet off the ground
I'm hearin what you say but I just can't make a sound
You tell me that you need me
Then you go and cut me down, but wait
You tell me that you're sorry
Didn't think I'd turn around, and say...

It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late

I'd take another chance, take a fall
Take a shot for you
And I need you like a heart needs a beat
But it's nothin new - yeah yeah
I loved you with a fire red-
Now it's turning blue, and you say...
"Sorry" like the angel heaven let me think was you
But I'm afraid...

It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late

It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late
It's too late to apologize, yeah
I said it's too late to apologize, yeah-
I'm holdin on your rope, got me ten feet off the ground...

It can be so interesting how two people can see the exact same thing with two completely different views on it.

Let me give you an example.
For a goy, to look at a rainbow is a beautiful event and to us , yidden, it gives a pain in our side knowing that yet again god would have destroyed the world but had promised not to.

lets look at some more examples.

When I see kids look up into the beautiful dark sky they see these flashing lights from some place showing that there is action. You know, those lights that go criss cross telling everyone to join in the fun. Those kids say "it looks sooo cool!" Well I look at those lights and all I can think about is "those lights are my enemy, my fear, and oh so deadly". Those lights are coming from s strip club that seems to destroy my life little by little.

How could something that looks so beautiful can be used so positively or so negatively. So many things that be used for good or for bad. It's amazing how god gave so much Bechirah that we have such hardship to choose to go in the right direction.

How could god create so much good with so much evil? How could one person use an object for Simcha when another can use the same object for hardship?

As the generations go further and further human beings, can't handle so much choice. All I see these days are people going in the wrong direction. We have to much taiva with to much Bechira.

Sometimes I go into bed and talk to god and say "Please tell me what is the right thing to do. How should I feel about certain things and please tell me how to live day to day knowing all the bad that goes on around me."

I need to know answers. I need to know why there is so much pain.

Every marriage needs to have space. I know that logically but in my heart it is hard to let go. Some time apart is golden for most marriages because your heart starts to yearn for your loved one. So why can't I finally let my spouse be.

LET HIM BE, I tell myself.

Do we really need to know every single inch of our spouses life. When he/she went to the bathroom, ate for lunch, how many times he/she sneezed and of course what he really did that night with the guys.

Do i really want for us to be right on top of each other?

I am always worried he will look the other way, the thought of him looking at another girl makes my skin crawl. Why do I react like this.

LET HIM BE, I tell myself.

I admit I am insecure. Isn't every girl? I even read that supermodels go through the same thing. SO why don't i just set him free from my fear, my insecurity, my irrational thoughts.
My husband is a good person, tries to do things right, and we all fall sometimes. I need to let him fall and accept it. This is the way our marriage can grow.

LET HIM BE, I tell myself.

Do you give your spouse enough space? How much space is to much?